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Rushian Annoys with Rush Lyrics

 
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awip2062



Joined: 13 Nov 2003
Posts: 25543

PostPosted: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:02 pm    Post subject: Rushian Annoys with Rush Lyrics Reply with quote

RUSH FAN ANNOYS FRIENDS WITH PEART FIXATION
Aaron Wilkes, a 27-year-old Rush fan from Akron, Ohio, has a fixation on the band that's "way beyond normal," according to his friends and family. Wilkes, a fan of the Canadian trio since first hearing the Hemispheres album, has increasingly been using Rush lyrics in conversation. "It's totally absurd, dude," said friend Barry Wolf, a forklift driver at an Akron fudge-packing factory. "Nearly every time I speak to him he uses these dumb phrases that he's picked up from Rush songs.


"I mean, last week we were being chased by the cops after we shoplifted a bunch of Dream Theater and Transatlantic CDs from the local record store cutout bin, and as we're running, Aaron yells, 'It's not how fast you can go, the force goes into the flow!' It was ridiculous -- and it keeps happening! Just yesterday we were driving down the street listening to the radio, and Aaron keeps calling the DJ a 'companion, unobtrusive' and yammering about how 'invisible airwaves crackle with life.' It's really annoying. Do you know how hard it is to score with chicks when you're in the backs of cars and he keeps saying 'subdivisions' in some gay voice, and talking about Ayn Rand? It's insane!"


Wilkes, who was fired from his job at Starbucks after telling customers that the espresso would "take them on a passage to Bangkok," maintains that he isn't a Rush fanatic. Rather, his vocabulary is "simply very similar to that of [lyricist] Neil Peart. I play drums too, but I'm nowhere near as accomplished as he is. I guess some are born to move the world, to live their fantasies. But most of us just dream about the things we'd like to be."

"I wish he'd forget about his obsession with those Canadians and do something constructive with his time," lamented Aaron's father Jim, a recycling manager. "When he was little he loved playing with his telescope and spacemen, and he used to build model rockets and stuff like that. We even took him to see a launch at Cape Canaveral one time....."


"Ah yes, what an event," interrupts Aaron. "Lit up with anticipation, we arrive at the launching site, the sky is still dark, nearing dawn on the Florida coastline..."


"Um, yeah," the senior Wilkes replied, rolling his eyes. "But now all he does is lay around listening to Rush and reading The Fountainhead over and over."


Aaron is an ardent fan of Rand, the novelist who promoted objectivism as the ideal philosophy for mankind, and whose work is cited as a major influence by Peart.


"Of course," says Aaron wistfully, "how could I forget her great works? But c'mon, it's just a coincidence that Neil Peart is a big fan of hers. I discovered her work on my own, not in the back of 2112. Live for yourself... there's no one else, more worth living for, begging hands and bleeding hearts will only cry out for more..."


Barry, however, disagress. "Dude, you need to stop talking like some right-wing libertarian! This Ayn Rand shit is going to make people think you're a fag! Why don't you get a real job and earn some money!"


"But Barry," countered Aaron, "big money goes around the world! Big money makes no sense!"


"See?" groaned Barry. "He's like this all the time now. I can't even listen to A Show Of Hands any more - I know I might be hearing the same lyrics the next day when i see Aaron."


"Ah yes", sighed Wilkes, "A Show of Hands. What a great live album that is. I recall seeing Rush on the Counterparts tour. Man, after they finished the show and left the stage, it truly was a farewell to kings..."


- Vim Fuego

You can find it at: http://www.roadrunnerrecords.com/infernalcombustion/news.aspx?newsitemID=37
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funky cm



Joined: 24 Apr 2004
Posts: 844
Location: Vancouver Island

PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 1:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

fudge packing factory
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Kares4Rush



Joined: 13 Nov 2003
Posts: 3187
Location: New York

PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That is so FREAKIN' Funny!! Laughing
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awip2062



Joined: 13 Nov 2003
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 9:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It made me laugh, so I thought I would post it.

Anyone want to visit Akron's Starbucks with me and see if their coffee really will take us on a passage to Bangkok? LOL
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