dogs

Devil's Advocate · Post by **Devil's Advocate** » Tue Dec 02, 2003 9:00 am

5 Basic Rules for Dogs
(Author Unknown)
Visitors: Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern.

Barking: Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark. So bark--- a lot. Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house. Especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark...

The art of sniffing: Humans like to be sniffed. Everywhere. It is your duty, as the family dog, to accommodate them.

Holes: Rather than digging a BIG hole in the middle of the garden and upsetting your human, dig a lot of smaller holes all over the garden so they won't notice. If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole, maybe they'll think it is a mole. There are never enough holes in the ground. Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem.

Dining etiquette: Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor. It's also a good time to practice your sniffing.

Kares4Rush · Post by **Kares4Rush** » Tue Dec 02, 2003 9:47 am

Mr. Potatoe Head · Post by **Mr. Potatoe Head** » Tue Dec 02, 2003 11:33 am

good one D.A.
as long as the dog don't start humping my leg or nibbling

Sympho · Post by **Sympho** » Tue Dec 02, 2003 4:20 pm

If men were dogs.. they would lick their own balls..

(all day long)

Aerosmitten · Post by **Aerosmitten** » Tue Dec 02, 2003 10:38 pm

rushlight · Post by **rushlight** » Tue Dec 02, 2003 10:55 pm

Aren't you a cat person?

wcp · Post by **wcp** » Wed Dec 03, 2003 11:54 am

i wish i had a dog.

Sir Myghin · Post by **Sir Myghin** » Wed Dec 03, 2003 3:26 pm

my dogs was awesome, used to kill cats, fun fun days

wcp · Post by **wcp** » Wed Dec 03, 2003 8:47 pm

Sounds like fun to me!

Sympho · Post by **Sympho** » Thu Dec 04, 2003 10:03 am

My goldfish, Willy, is scared of dogs..

AnalogK · Post by **AnalogK** » Sat Dec 20, 2003 12:57 pm

My Lil Bro has a Taco-Bell like Chihuahua