If Women were Soccer Teams

[Slaine mac Roth]

Birmingham City - Pamela Anderson

Used to look good in the cups but now a declining force. Plus millions watched them get a good seeing to.

Wigan Athletic - Davinia McCall

Poor attendances cinfirm they've been promoted above their ability.

Portsmouth - Girls Aloud

only one real class act among the hastily assembled line up. You shouldn't like them but, admit it, you've sneaked the occasional glance.

Sunderland - Kerry Katona

Once the people's favourite but now an embarassment. Fun while it lasted - now disappear back to where you came from...PLEASE

Tottenham Hotspur - Keira Knightley

Undeniably easy on the eye with an attractive English spine. Proof that two little ones up front needn't be a drawback

Everton - Danii Minogue

The poor relation to the more glamorous sibling. Can anyone remember when it was that they were supposed to be any good?

Fulham - Charlotte Church

Proof that money can't buy you class but could look more attractive if the Welsh bloke was given the elbow.

Arsenal - Jordan

Were more likeable when they weren't packed out with expensive foreign imports

Newcastle United - Jodie Marsh

impressive front two but embarassing at the back. had surgery but need a lot more work to compete at a higher level.

Aston Villa - Dido

Bland, boring and still trading off the one big hit they had years ago

Liverpool - Sophie Ellis-Bextor

indivdually all the components look great but, stick them together and it just doesn't work

Chelsea - Rachel Stevens

You'd rather just watch them than listen to all that painful whining

Bolton Wanderers - Clare Balding

You wouldn't...even if they were the last team on earth

Manchester United - Catherine Zeta Jones

Used to look great until they were shafted by an old fat American with too much money

[YYZ30]

Manchester United - Catherine Zeta Jones

Used to look great until they were shafted by an old fat American with too much money

LMAO! So true!!!!